Rep sets up suicide support group to help others

6 September 2024

A North Yorkshire Police Federation rep who lost her dad to suicide set up a peer support group to help other people with similar experiences.

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Sergeant Elaine Malcolm has spoken about losing her dad in a powerful new video produced by North Yorkshire Police Federation for World Suicide Prevention Day

And she has highlighted the work of the Darlington Survivors of Bereavement by Suicide (SOBS) group, which she set up last year.

Elaine said: “It’s important for me to do what I can to help other people who have been bereaved, so that they have that support and can deal with it better.”

Watch sergeant and Fed Rep Elaine Malcolm's video.

The branch’s emotional new film aims to break down the barriers around suicide and mental health.

In the film, Elaine talks about the impact of losing her dad and encouraged people to check in with family and friends.

“I often think about what things would have been like now if my dad was still alive, and what would be different if someone had asked if he was okay and checked on him,” she said.

Ask twice

“Ask people if they’re okay. Ask your friends, ask your family, ask them twice, ask them four times if it’s going to prevent them being in the same boat as my family.”

Elaine has also spoken about the work of SOBS, a national charity which helps people support each other at the time of their loss, and in the months and years that follow.

It aims to provide safe, confidential environments where people can share their experiences and feelings, giving and gaining support from each other.

The Darlington branch meets once a month, and people can email for more information.

Nationally, SOBS runs two support groups for the police family. One is or members of the police service who have been bereaved, and the other is for families of police officers and staff who have been lost to suicide. 

Elaine said: “SOBS is so important to me as I never want a bereaved family to feel like they're alone. It's not a nice place.”

Support

She added: “My family had no support. We never spoke about suicide as a family, really.

We never said the word suicide until about four years ago.

“If there was something like SOBS that was able to help my family then I think things would be quite different.”

And Elaine said that awareness events, such as today’s World Suicide Prevention Day, are important in breaking down barriers.

“It’s not just about those you have lost but people who are going through it,” she said. “If everyone can talk about it then lives can be saved, and for survivors of bereavement, it’s going to be that bit easier to deal with.”

More information about SOBS is available on the charity’s website.

Watch the full North Yorkshire Police Federation video.